Quaich Photos

Click to this link for all photos: Quaich 2016 Photos

Where Do You Rank? Quaich Player Statistics All Time

Final Match Results from Austin

That's Fantastic! Denholm Named 2018 Scottish Captain

By winning all four of his matches in Austin, Ronald “NSW Ronnie” Denholm showed the leadership skills that will serve him well as 2018 Scottish Team Captain.  A Quaich veteran, NSW Ronnie is Scotland's highest points producer and sits just one point behind USA's Brian "Goombay" Farley in all-time Quaich points.

"NSW Ronnie is a brilliant star," said out-going Scotland Captain Ross "Rosco" MacCallum.  "I trust he will build off my winning formula in 2018."

Denholm is a 1987 graduate of the University of Edinburgh.  He is currently on "garden leave" from his job at Barley's Bank, allowing him lots and lots of time strategize about the 2018 Quaich.  He spends his quiet days tending to chrysanthemums and impatiens along with a boxwood border at his Brighton home.

Scotland Wins The Quaich!

In a defining moment in Quaich history, Team Scotland won the Quaich over the U.S.A. by a final score of 11½ to 7½.  Winless since 2006, Scotland took the Quaich for the third time with its first win on U.S. soil.   The Scottish players celebrated late into the night on Sunday in Austin, Texas, sharing their joy via video calls with loved ones back in Caledonia.

Victorious Team Scotland at Barton Creek

“Ah’m o’er the moon,” said an emotional Ross “Rosco” MacCallum, the Scottish captain, with tears welling in his eyes.  “Ah still cannae believe it.”

“We won! Yaldi!,” exclaimed Ronald “NSW Ronnie” Denholm, who won all four of his matches to lead Team Scotland in points.

Scotland exorcised its demons and quieted its critics with a dominant performance in Austin, Texas.  Scotland won the opening day on Friday, the morning session on Saturday, and never looked back. Any hope of a USA comeback was squelched late on Saturday afternoon during the team scramble competition at the Coore Crenshaw course’s 17^th green.  Clinging to a 1 up lead in the match, the Scottish team of Allen “Oor Wullie” Wilson and Douglas “Slicer” Brown were on the verge of losing the hole.  With the Americans safely in for par, Oor Wullie faced a slippery 25-foot downhill shot from the fringe.  The crowd gathered around the green agreed that the Scottish team had little chance to get down in two to halve the hole from that perilous position.  But with the calm of a Quaich veteran, rookie Oor Wullie used a classic “Texas wedge” to hole the shot, break the hearts of the assembled American team, and secure the point for Scotland.

Sky Sports golf commentator Ewen Murray praised Captain MacCallum’s strategy.  “He simply out-foxed the U.S. captain,” said Murray.  Rosco’s controversial “no drinking” rule for his team paid huge dividends.  And sending out the same pairings on the Saturday morning and afternoon sessions was a stroke of genius as Scotland used the day to build on its lead.  “Even Rosco’s pretending to get confused about the order of his singles selection on Sunday was a well-calculated ruse,” said one Scottish insider.

The Wee's celebrate their victory

As for Team USA, they will spend the next two years reflecting on this loss.  The U.S. team never found its rhythm in Austin.  Aside from the 3 points earned by U.S. Captain Chris “Guvna” Hughes, there were not many bright spots for Team USA.  Stalwart player Brian “Goombay” Farley seemed uninspired throughout the weekend and only managed 2 points.  And “the Original Three” veteran players James “Sheets” Moreland , Chris “Cudman” Van Horne and Stephen “Web” Webster achieved a dismal 2 ½ points between them.  “We’re thinking of reducing the role of the Original Three to just ceremonial opening tee shots in 2018,” said a bitter USA player, who asked to remain anonymous.  In fairness, Sheets suffered a debilitating lateral oblique injury while warming-up before day one of the Quaich and was never the same.   “The Sheets injury was a big set-back for Team USA,” said Brandel Chamblee of Golf Channel. “That lateral oblique was the biggest Quaich health scare since the Wee Mikey Chinese food episode in 2014.”

“I’m proud of my guys,” said U.S. Captain Chris “Guvna” Hughes.  “We just got beat by a better team.” 

“It will change in 2018,” said U.S. President-elect Donald Trump when informed of the Quaich results. “We will have so much winning that you may get bored with winning. Believe me.”

The USA now leads the modern Quaich series with 5 wins to Scotland’s 3.

Safely in the arms of Rosco, the Quaich returned to its ancestral homeland on British Air flight 109 on Monday night.  Announcements of the date and location of Quaich 2018 will come in late 2017.

Interpreting Sheets Speak

Late on Saturday afternoon, USA player James “Sheets” Moreland was numb from a cocktail of Bud Lights and prescription strength Diclofenac Sodium.  Having just lost a spirited two-man scramble match, Sheets staggered atop a hill near the 17^th green at the Coore Crenshaw course and began to cheer on his teammates as their matches finished up.   Even at his most articulate, Sheets can be hard to understand, but he reached new heights of incomprehensibility on Saturday afternoon.  Our cameras were there to capture the moment.  What do you hear in this video?

Vodka and Estrogen Flow Freely At Quaich!

A cat-fight of epic proportions occurred on Friday night after the first round of the Quaich.  With the USA already down 2 1/2 to 1 1/2 points, USA Captain Chris “Guvna” Hughes made the decision to call in a substitute for an injured James “Sheets” Moreland.  Incredibly, the Captain's decision was allegedly blocked by his own teammate, Stephen “Web” Webster.  During late night drinks at Banger’s Sausage House Beer Garden in Austin, Guvna was heard to scream about “insubordination” and “executive privilege”.  Web slurred a few vodka-infused words about the “spirit of the Quaich” and “no interlopers”.  Seeing the Americans beginning to implode, the Scottish team quietly disappeared into the night.  The American team continued fighting among themselves into the early hours of the morning.

Many Quaich insiders say that Web, in particular, tends to feed off drama.  “Web has been involved in most of the drama over the years in the Quaich,” said an unnamed source.  “Let’s just say it’s not just a coincidence. Web’s a bit of a drama mama.”

Indeed, Web has been at their epicenter of many of the great Quaich controversies in the past.  Web was actively involved in the Graeme Wilson ball touching accusation at Lossiemouth, the sweet potato soup incident at Castle Stewart, and the fake tequila shots at North Berwick.

Guvna and Web in happier times

This is certainly not the first time Web has squabbled with his own team.  Sources tell us that in 2014 in the Highlands, Web and then-Captain Eric “Swayze” Silagy exchanged personal invectives at the dining table over a suggested benching of Web for poor play.   The slurs “controlling Type A douche canoe” and “passive-aggressive feeble dicked jizztissue” were heard ringing from the walls of the great room of Quarryfield.  Six years earlier, because Web was not collaborative in selecting pairings while Captain in Colorado in 2008, he had a very public argument with Cudman during dinner at Six89 in Carbondale.  The two did not speak for 24-hours after the ugly episode.

“Web is crazier'n all git out!” said one anonymous source with a Texas twang. “I done told ya he was on his period this weekend.”

“I don’t know why I always end up in the middle of these incidents,” said a contrite Web. “I’m looking forward to having a drama-free Quaich in 2018.”

Quaich Week Has Begun

Quaich Week has begun! The first to arrive in Austin is a very eager Michael "Wee Mikey" Redford from Team Scotland.  Real-time updates this week will be posted from the Quaich Facebook Fan Page.  Please "Like" the page at https://www.facebook.com/QuaichGolf/ to get the posts into your regular Facebook feed.

Wee Mikey and the Guvna at Lake Travis in Austin, Texas

Weather Forecast for Quaich - Toasty!

Players from both teams are packing the sunscreen and shorts for this year's Quaich matches.  The weather forecast for Austin for next week looks to be warm and sunny.  By way of contrast, the same forecast for Edinburgh during this stretch calls for wind, rain and high temperatures of 55 degrees Fahrenheit.  

The weather will be ideal for the aging Quaich participants.  James "Sheets" Moreland has on-going lower back issues, but the warm weather should keep his thoracolumbar fascia muscle relatively loose. USA's Brian "Goombay" Farley has a "material" right wrist injury.  He is counting on Advil, cortisone injections, and the warm Texas sunshine to keep him going.  Ian "Big Man" MacCallum is once again listed only as "probable" to start for Scotland because of his chronic "dodgy hip".  The eighty degree temps will surely help him rotate through the ball when the teams tee it up on Friday.  Finally, the warm weather will be a relief for Ray "Mundo" Bonilla of Team USA.  After double hip replacement surgery earlier this year, Mundo is rumored to require help getting out of a parked car because of his lack of flexibility.

Quaich 2016 starts one week from today in Austin, Texas.

Quaich Nostalgia

Rosco at Medalist in 2012

With the opening tee shots of the 2016 Quaich next week in Austin, the Scottish and American teams will meet for the eighth time in the modern era.  The Quaich has a rich history.  Here are some throwback photos from past matches.

Sheets at River Valley in 2008

NSW Ronnie, Web and Wee Mikey at Dunbar in 2010

Big Man, Web and Swayze at The Old Course in 1989

Cudman, Mundo, Hef, Goombay and Swayze at Lossiemouth in 2014

Wee Mikey, Big Man, H, NSW Ronnie, Wee Mikey P and Rosco at St. Andrews Bay in 2002

Formats and Courses

USGA match play rules apply to all events.  In match play the game is played by holes. A hole is won by the side that holes its ball in fewer strokes.  In the Quaich, matches will be handicapped per mutual agreement of the Captains, and the lower net score wins the hole.

Friday, October 28

Four Ball

Each golfer plays their own ball throughout the round, such that four balls are in play. A team's number of strokes for a given hole is that of the lower scoring team member.

Palmer Lakeside 

(https://www.omnihotels.com/hotels/austin-barton-creek/golf/palmer-lakeside)

Saturday, October 29 

A.M. 

Four Ball

Each golfer plays their own ball throughout the round, such that four balls are in play. A team's number of strokes for a given hole is that of the lower scoring team member.

Fazio Canyons 

(https://www.omnihotels.com/hotels/austin-barton-creek/golf/fazio-canyons)

P.M. 

Two-Man Scramble

Each player tees off, the best tee shot is selected and all players play their second shots from that spot. The best second shot is determined, and then all play their third shots from that spot, and so on until the ball is holed.

Coore Crenshaw 

(https://www.omnihotels.com/hotels/austin-barton-creek/golf/coore-crenshaw)

Sunday, October 30

Singles

Fazio Foothills

(https://www.omnihotels.com/hotels/austin-barton-creek/golf/fazio-foothills)

Quaich 2016 Schedule of Events

The schedule of events for Quaich 2016 has been released.  It looks to be another epic get-together.  The schedule proves that, as usual, the Quaich is as much an endurance contest as it is a golf match.  Bring it

2016 Quaich

Barton Creek Resort and Country Club

Austin, Texas

October 26^th to 30th

Wednesday October 27^th

4:00 PM – 6:00 PM
Arrive: Omni Barton Creek Resort

(Transportation from Airport to Resort

will be provided).

6:30 – 8:30 PM
Cocktails and Dinner at the Resort.             

8:30 – 11:00 PM
Drinks, Hazing, and Bullshitting                  

                                                   

Thursday October 27^th

8:00 AM – 9:00 AM
Breakfast: Main Dining Room (On your own)   

(Full Breakfast Buffest available)

10:00 AM – 3:00 PM
Practice Round on Fazio Foothills course        

5:00 PM
Cocktails at Resort                                          

5:45 PM

Depart Resort for Salt Lick BBQ in Driftwood, TX        

(Beer and Cocktails provided en route)

6:30 PM
Opening Dinner at Salt Lick                                                                         

8:30 PM

Depart Salt Lick for 6^th Street                                                                      

Entertainment District                                             

11:30 PM
Depart Downtown Austin for Resort                                                         

Friday October 28th

7:00 – 8:00 AM
Breakfast:  Main Dining Room                                                                     

8:30 AM
Depart: For Palmer Lakeside course                                                          

10:00 AM
Quaich Opening Round Tee Off                                                                   

(Box Lunch provided)

2:30 – 3:30 PM
Depart Lakeside for Resort                                                                         

6:15 PM
Depart Resort for El Mercado Cantina                                                    

(Downtown Austin)

6:45 – 8:45 PM
Dinner at El Mercado                                                                                   

8:45 PM
Depart El Mercado for South Congress

or Rainey St. Entertainment Districts                                                         

11:00 PM
Depart South Congress for Resort                                                             

Saturday October 29^th

7:30 AM
Depart Resort for Fazio Canyons course                                                   

(Breakfast Tacos will be provided) (10 minute bus ride)

8:30 AM
Quaich Second Round Tee Off                                                                    

1:30 PM
Depart Fazio Canyons for Resort                                                               

(Box Lunch provided at Resort)

2:00 PM
Third Round Tee Off: Coore/Crenshaw Cliffside course                         

7:00 – 8:00 PM
Cocktails at Resort                                                                                        

8:15 PM
Depart Resort for Warehouse Entertainment District                             

8:45 PM
Pizza Dinner, football watching                                                                   

11:00 PM
Depart Warehouse District for Resort                                                       

Sunday October 30th                                                                                                                               

7:00 – 8:00 AM
Breakfast: Main Dining Room                                                                      

8:30 AM
Final Round Tee Off: Fazio Foothills                                                          

1:30 – 3:00 PM
Snacks, Beer, and Bragging                                                                          

5:00 PM
Depart Resort for Closing Dinner

(Steiner Ranch Steak House overlooking Lake Travis)                                

5:30 -7:00 PM
Drinks and Sunset                                                                                         

7:00 PM
Closing Dinner                                                                                               

9:00 PM

Depart Steiner Ranch for Resort                                                                

Desperation or Brilliance? Team Scotland Rounds Out Its Roster with Slicer and “Oor Wullie”

Edinburgh, September 5, 2016

Team Scotland announced its final Captain’s Picks for the 2016 Quaich matches earlier today in a press conference at the Assembly Rooms on George Street in Edinburgh.   Scottish Captain Ross “Rosco” MacCallum named Dr. Douglas “Slicer” Brown and Allen “Oor Wullie” Wilson as the seventh and eighth players on his roster.

Guvna and Slicer in Florida, June 2012

Avid Quaich fans will remember Slicer as a stealthy rookie in the 2012 Quaich in Florida.  The last time we saw Slicer in action, he was taking down Chris “Guvna” Hughes 8&7 in singles at Ballenisles in 2012. It was the last recorded Dog’s License in Quaich history.  “Aye, ‘twas a proud day fur me,” said Slicer.  “I expect to hang another license on Guvna in Austin.” 

For his part, the Guvna relishes the opportunity for revenge. “Dangit, now you got the Guvna all worked up for nothin’,” said Guvna when reminded of his 2012 singles defeat. “Guvna’s fixin’ tuh git-r-done this year.”

“I’m delighted to have Slicer back on the team,” said Rosco.  “He plays well in the States and is a proven winner when partnered with Ronnie.”  

Slicer, who is a licensed doctor in St. Andrews, and Ronald “Not So Wee Ronnie” Denholm were undefeated as a pair in 2012.  “I don’t know if they’ll be paired together again,” said an unnamed source inside the American team.  “But it will be good to have a doctor familiar with Heimlich maneuver around when NSW Ronnie attacks the breakfast buffet at the Omni Barton Creek Resort,”

Quaich Blog Flashback: Slicer's 2012 Introduction

Allen Wilson and his namesake "Orr Wullie"

Allen “Oor Wullie” Wilson is a mystery.  Reportedly born and raised in Glasgow, Oor Wullie now lives in Vancouver, Canada where he runs an oil exploration firm and plays to a single digit handicap.   Quaich officials are still confirming Oor Wullie’s eligibility to play for Scotland, but Captain MacCallum is confident that he will be confirmed.  “He’s more Scottish than Ben Nevis, haggis, Sheena Easton and Irn Bru combined,” said Rosco.

“This story has more twists than a pretzel factory,” said Guvna when informed of Oor Wullie’s background. “The man claims to be of Scottish birth, resides in Canada, but spends more time in Oklahoma than he does anywhere else.” 

“Un-fucking-believable,” said Chris “Cudman” Van Horne.  “So now only half of Team Scotland actually live in the country they claim to represent.”

Ignoring the criticism, Rosco is excited about bringing in a ringer who can match up well against American stalwart Brian “Stealth” Farley.  “Oor Wullie will rally gie’n it laldy in Austin,” said Rosco.

The 2016 Quaich matches will commence on October 28^th in Austin, Texas.

Is This A Joke? Scottish Captain MacCallum Gives Riddler the Boot!

Rosco and Riddler in happier times

Kevin “Riddler” Riddle was informed late on Friday by Scottish Captain Ross “Rosco” MacCallum that he would not be asked to join the team for Quaich 2016 in Austin, Texas next month.  Scotland fans were shocked and angered by the move, especially given that Riddler was enjoying a renaissance in his golf game and was among the leading points producers for Team Scotland in 2014.

“I have great respect for Riddler,” said Rosco.  “But I feel that we need to change our formula and bring in new players to be successful in America.”

“Ah'm fuckin beelin, so ah um,” said an enraged Riddler.  “Ross is a right diddie so he is.”

Rosco's Twitter account immediately filled with hateful tweets from Riddler's loyal fans.

"@rossmaccallum1 Keep Riddler, you tit!"

"@rossmaccallum1 You're such a Gobshite!"

"@rossmaccallum1 Why?  You witless fucking cocksplat!"

"@rossmaccallum1 Riddler was your best player, you idiotic jizztrumpet!"

The move leaves Captain MacCallum with two spots to fill when he announces his Captain’s Picks at a press conference on Monday in Edinburgh.

Swayze's Failed Swing Changes Boost Scottish Team Confidence

It has been rumored all winter that former USA Captain Eric "Swayze" Silagy was overhauling his swing in preparation for the 2016 Quaich matches.  Swayze has been quietly working with Medalist Golf Club (Florida) head professional Buddy Antonopoulos on altering his well-known "pinch" move on the downswing in order to generate more distance.  Swayze recently debuted his new swing at an exhibition match at Elie in Scotland and the results were shocking.

Swayze's new swing on display on 17th tee at Elie

"It's a bit o' a shocker," said Kevin "Riddler" Riddle, who witnessed Swayze lurching awkwardly at the ball throughout the afternoon. "He was in a richt pelter all day!"

Swayze took a beating from Ian "Big Man" MacCallum and Riddler in an 18-hole match at the Quaich 2002 venue.  When Swayze hit his drive out-of-bounds left onto the beach on the 13th hole followed by two shots "Oscar Bravo" on 14, it sealed his fate.

Although Swayze insisted on no photographs on the course for the match, a spectator secretly captured his weird new swing action with a mobile phone (see photo).

"I cudnae watch it!" exclaimed Ian "Big Man" MacCallum.  "'Tis nae natural."

Swayze's swing challenges can be seen as good news for Team Scotland as things heat up in advance of the big showdown in Austin against Team USA in October.

Riddler Emerges from Seclusion with New Svelte Physique

Riddler (on right) drinking a pint of Sheepshagger's Light 

Kevin "Riddler" Riddle had not been seen publicly in months.  When he recently emerged from seclusion to attend the "Quaich Toast to Champions" event at The Canny Man's in Edinburgh, Riddler looked significantly slimmer.

"Aye, I've lost 5 stone," said Riddler, sipping a pint of 105 calorie Sheepshagger's Light.

Riddler, who is a stalwart player for Team Scotland, looks ready to take on the Americans single-handedly in Austin in October.

With Riddler's dramatic weight loss, the heaviest player on Team Scotland may now be Ronald "Not So Wee Ronnie" Denholm.  Although he too is rarely seen in public, Ronnie has been rumored to have added at least one chin since Quaich 2014.

Waist sizes (left to right) in centimeters: 112, 84, and 107

The official participant weigh-in for Quaich 2016 will take place at the Three Springs Spa at the Omni Barton Creek Resort on the evening of October 27.

2020 Quaich Site Visit

Hoping to increase its chances of being awarded the host city for the 2020 Quaich, Chicago entertained a delegation of dignitaries this week.  Stephen "Web" Webster and Brian "Stealth" Farley toured the facilities and played 18 holes at potential venue Barrington Hills Country Club.

"The quality of the courses, along with easy access to one of the great cities of the world, would make Chicago a fantastic host site for the 2020 Quaich," said Farley.

Web and Farley at Barrington Hills Country Club

The staff at Barrington Hills went out of its way to make sure the dignitaries felt pampered.  After multiple beers on the course and several rum cocktails in the locker room after the round, Web slurred, "Whada greaaaat place. Isssshhh gotma
vote."

H Drops Out Of 2016 Matches Citing "Quaich Fatigue"

A tired Graeeme "H" Wilson relaxes at home in Edinburgh

Graeme “H” Wilson, one of the founding fathers of the modern Quaich, announced today that he will not be joining the Scottish team for the biannual matches in October in Austin, Texas.  The news came as a shock to the golfing world on both sides of the Atlantic.

“After assessing the present condition of my game and consulting with my family, I've decided it's prudent to miss this year's Quaich,” said H in a prepared statement on his website (http://graemewilson.com/).   “I simply do not have the energy or enthusiasm needed to play.  While I hate to not to represent my country, I need to do what's best for my long-term health.”

It is no secret that H has not been the same golfer since devoting more of his time to fatherhood.  Since the arrival of his lovely daughter, Grace, in 2011, H has not had the time or interest in the grueling preparation required to play at a high level in the Quaich.

“Wee Grace is my first priority,” said H.

“A dinna ken he’s yappin’ aboot,” said Scotsman Michael “Wee Mikey” Redford when told of H’s decision.  “I have nine bairns in five different countries, and it’s never got in the way of ma golf.”

But is H’s withdrawal from the Quaich really due to family considerations? Insiders say that H was disillusioned after the 2014 Quaich, causing him to lose interest in continuing for Team Scotland.  Besides recording a personal low of 1.5 points in 2014, H was fuming at being accused of breaking the rules during a hotly contested fourball match at Lossiemouth.  In a fit of gamesmanship, American Stephen “Web” Webster claimed H was continually lifting his ball while in play --- a clear breach of the rules of golf.  H vehemently denied any wrong doing.  The resulting altercation between the Americans and Scots on the fourth fairway was ugly and affected the tone of the match. 

“Web is a daft wallaper,” said H angrily. “He’s the compulsive clawbaw, not me.”  Insiders say H believes the true spirit of the Quaich was destroyed that afternoon, and he wants no part of it going forward.

“I'd like to thank the fans for their concern and support,” said H in the prepared statement.  “The last two years have been difficult, but I have the best fans anywhere, and I want them to know that."

Scottish Captain Ross “Rosco” MacCallum will announce a replacement for H in the coming weeks.

Coincidental Meeting in Florida Fosters Inter-squad Relations

American Stephen "Web" Webster was recently attending a business meeting at the Hyatt Regency Coconut Point in Bonita Springs, Florida when he looked across the hotel bar. Sitting with two exotic-looking twenty-five -year-old women was none other than a well-preserved Tony "Hef" Denson of the Scottish team.  The two enjoyed catching up and exchanging observations on the upcoming Quaich matches.

Great Scott! Team Scotland Files “Birther” Lawsuit

PGA Tour player Adam Scott won his second consecutive tournament today in Miami, Florida.  Rather than reflecting on the $2.7 million he earned by winning the Honda Classic and WGC-Cadillac on consecutive weeks during the Florida swing, Scott wanted to talk about his strong interest in playing for Team USA during the 2016 Quaich matches.

“I’m very close to Swayze,” said Scott, referring to Team USA player Eric “Swayze” Silagy. “And I know how much the Quaich means to him.  At his request, I have committed to playing for Team USA in October in order to retain the Quaich.”

Best Buddies: Swayze and Adam Scott

Team Scotland immediately cried foul, pointing to the "natural born citizen" eligibility requirement specified in the Quaich by-laws.  In the opinion of Team Scotland, Scott, who was born in Adelaide, Australia in 1980, is not eligible to play for Team USA. 

Team USA representatives do not argue with the fact that Scott was born in Australia.  However, they point out that his mother, Pam, is American.   “We maintained that Adam is eligible to play for Team USA,” said Team USA Captain Chris “Guv’na” Hughes, noting the distinction between natural-born and naturalized citizens.

Team Scotland has filed a “birther” lawsuit in the U.S. District Court for the Western District of Texas to block Scott’s eligibility to play for Team USA.  “When Adam Scott was born, at the moment of his birth, location determined his status, and his status was that of a natural-born Australian citizen, not American,” said Kent D. McPhail, attorney for Team Scotland.  “You cannot be a natural-born or native-born citizen of two countries."

“My good friend ‘Scotty’ will be a great addition to the team,” said Swayze confidently.

Check back with the Quaich Blog for updates on this developing story.

Caption Contest Featuring The Guv'na

We are running a Quaich "Caption Contest" for the following recent photo of the Guv'na.  Use the "Post A Comment" feature below this post to enter your own caption.  To get the ideas flowing, we have eight sample captions below.  Have fun with this one!

Caption ideas:

1. "Wait!  I was told this hot tub would be full of bros"
2. Where is his other hand?
3. "I'm smiling because I'm sitting on the volcano jet"
4. Wearing what the Scots would call "Budgie Smugglers"
5. Throwback photo from the "Gay Barge" cruise on the intracoastal waterway during Quaich 2012
6. Google "Pseudimonas folliculitis".  I dare you.
7. "Hot Tub" is the pet name Vicky Van Horne uses for her husband
8. The hot girls are out of the frame, taking the photo

Quaich legends: Super Bowl edition

It's Super Bowl Sunday in the States, and in honor of the big game, we have a football throwback for Quaich fans.  Three current Quaich players are in the team photo below (circa 1975).  Can you identify them?  The answer key is below.

Answer key:

#80 = Sheets

# 38 = Swayze

#75 = Atco

Team USA Begins Tune Up for Quaich

Swayze and Web on the 16th at Medalist

Swayze and Web on the 18th at Jupiter Hills

Team USA, which is known for its meticulous Quaich preparation, began it's practice regime this week in south Florida. Stephen "Web" Webster joined former USA Captain Eric "Swayze" Silagy for an intense two-day practice session at The Medalist Golf Club and Jupiter Hills Club.  In an effort to fine-tune their swings, the two Quaich standouts spent time on the range at The Medalist under the watchful eye of club pros and Trackman swing monitoring technology.  

Web started his range session at Medalist by shanking a 7-iron directly in front of nearby PGA touring pro Jesper Parnevik.  Parnevik was heard muttering "Din jävla idiot!".  Despite that poor start, the time on the range led to incredible results.  "I really feel like I've dialed in the perfect swing," said an excited Web.  The results of the hard work are clear in these two slow-motion videos.

Yes, Swayze's video is indeed in slow motion.  He's working on a slower tempo in the lead up to the Quaich matches in Austin in October.